Gruesome Find

Sylvia · Gruesome Find

Gruesome Find

I haven't been watching much of the News of late, because it is so very depressing and I tend to flick through the channels, or alternatively listen to my favourite 60's music.

Tonight however, I'm busy painting and the TV is on in the background and the Newscaster reported an old woman had been found dead in her flat in Woodbridge. Apparently, she's been dead for three years and all that remained was her skeleton sitting upright in a chair. Her television was still on. Now doesn't that say something about the non-caring society we are living in?

Sandie Seward

Sylvia, the poor old dear, three years and nobody missed her? Well, I suppose if her pension was paid directly into her bank, and her outgoings were covered by Direct Debit, then she would not have needed to go anywhere or see anyone. But as you so rightly say, it's a sad reflection of todays uncaring and selfish society.

brian.b

with no disrespect to this lady, SURELY somebody would have noticed the smell from her decomposing body? at the same time, where were her relatives and/or friends to not report her that bit sooner? this is a very tragic case and an enquiry should be held pronto to find out why it was allowed to happen.

Sylvia

I heard it on the early evening news, on the TV and they said that she was an aged person, then I heard it again on the 10.30pm news and this time they reported her as being just 40, but the rest of the story remains the same.

Yes Brian, I agree with you, surely someone must have smelt her decomposing body and surely there were letters sent to that address that required an answer to, what about the electoral register, I get one of those every year requesting that it be returned by a certain date. So why didn't someone from the Local Council investigate, I wonder.

Did you hear it on the News too?

vailron · gruesome find

not heard that story on the news, but if true its very tragic, it is possible though that if seh was elderly, she had outlived all of her closest relatives.

brian.b

Sylvia · WOMAN FOUND DEAD IN FLAT AFTER 3 YEARS

WOMAN FOUND DEAD IN FLAT AFTER THREE YEARS

Horror ... Joyce's lonely bedsit

FULL NEWS INDEX

By JEROME STARKEY

A WOMAN of 40 lay dead in her flat for almost THREE YEARS without anyone missing her.

Joyce Vincent’s skeleton was surrounded by unopened Christmas presents, an inquest heard.

The TV and heating were on, washing-up lay in a kitchen bowl and a mountain of post was stacked behind the front door.

Police believe Joyce probably died of natural causes in 2003.

But her body, which was lying on a sofa, was only discovered by bailiffs in January this year.

It was so badly decomposed that the only way she could be identified was by comparing dental records with a holiday photo of her smiling.

Food in the flat was marked with 2003 expiry dates.

Joyce’s family, including her sisters, told the inquest that the flat was a women’s refuge where she had lived after becoming a victim of domestic violence.

They said she had been engaged but it was not known if she had married.

The family admitted they had lost touch after she moved to the self-contained bedsit — one of 100 above a shopping centre in Wood Green, North London.

Det Insp Michael Ainslie, of the Met Police, told the family in court: “It’s very sad no one raised the alarm.”

A policeman called to the scene said he noticed a “strong smell” like a body coming from inside the flat.

After the inquest, neighbours also admitted noticing a “foul, rotten smell”. But nobody reported it.

Police told the hearing in Hornsey, North London, there were no suspicious circumstances.

Pathologist Dr Simon Poole said he was unable to establish a cause of death given the “largely skeletal” remains.

Deputy Coroner Andrew Walker recorded an open verdict.

He said: “I offer my deepest sympathies to members of the family.”

The flat was managed by the Metropolitan Housing Trust.

A spokeswoman said bailiffs were called when Joyce, originally from Hammersmith, West London, fell badly behind with her rent.

They had not noticed earlier because the rent was partly covered by housing benefit.

The spokeswoman said the trust was “not contacted by neighbours or family to raise any concerns”.

The building’s caretaker Kevin Mann was present when Joyce’s body was found. He said: “She looked like she’d just come back from shopping.

“I live below and never noticed the smell. People keep themselves to themselves in this block.”

Next-door neighbour Mickel Dobbs, who moved in two years ago, admitted he noticed a “foul” smell.

He added: “Every time I opened my window I would see strange little black insects crawling through.”

Neighbour Celia Cassidy said: “I am totally shocked. Nobody knew anything at all.”

Another neighbour, Ngosi Tobin, said: “It’s terrible. In other countries people know their neighbours but not here. It is easy to see how it would happen. Poor woman.”

Sandie Seward

That last sentance just about sums things up, Sylvia, a very tragic and sad thing to happen. I'm still astounded that it took so long before anyone missed her. Poor woman.

Sylvia

Hi Admin, I copied it from the News Bulletin on the Website. It's tragic and I find it hard to believe that anyone could not have noticed her not being around for so long. The early evening news said she was an elderly person, but the later news reported her as being just 40.

Ken R

I think it's a really sad indictment of the society we live in today, that this sort of thing goes on and nobody does anything about it ! Sure, there will be a lot of teeth gnashing and hand wringing, do gooders will be crawling out of the woodwork to lament the poor womans fate, but at the end of the day, everyone will go back into their little box's and the same thing will happen again, maybe not next week or the week after, but sure as eggs is eggs, it will happen again.

The community spirit of old is dead and gone, everyone just seems to be of " I'm all right Jack" mentallity these days.

I agree, it's really sad and tragic and nobody should have to spend their last days in this kind of situation, if we treated animals this way, there would be a national outcry about it. Things have got to change, I'm not sure how, I don't have all the answers, but they have to change and sooner rather than later !

Sylvia

Hi Ken, yes I strongly agree with you, things have got to change. Let me tell you what happened here in Grays, about three months ago.

I live in an end of terrace block and immediately opposite, are the detached houses and occupying one of those detached dwellings is an old couple, their family all grown up.

I used to see them out and about quite often and stop and have a chat and pass the time of day, just to be polite. Anyway Ken, I've seen the old gentleman out shopping a few times, but not his wife Joan and I started to wonder if she is all right. Well, some months passed by and I still hadn't seen Joan, so I decided to go across and knock on their door to see if she is ok. Eric (the old gentleman) came to the door and he was very surprised to see me. I asked if Joan is ok, as I haven't seen her for some time and I was worried that she may be ill or something. Eric seemed delighted that I'd taken the trouble to come over and enquire and I went into the living room and spoke to Joan.

Joan has painful legs and feet and cannot get around like she used to, so Eric has to do the shopping. I didn't stay too long, as I felt a bit awkward turning up un announced, but they sure seemed grateful that I cared enough to go across the road and ask after her. Naturally, I said that if I can be of any help, please let me know. I haven't been over there for a while and perhaps I will pop an Easter Card through and write on it, hope you're ok Joan and hope your legs aren't giving you too much pain. I'll write my phone number on the card, just in case they might want to call me.

I'm not a saint and I don't expect a big pat on the back either, it's just that I know that I am getting that much older and one day I too, could be stuck between my four walls, unable to get out through illness and without any food. I'd love someone to call on me and ask if I'm ok, but people don't. It's even too much trouble for my girls to come and see me, such is this selfish society that we now live in. Your absolutely right, 'I'M ALL RIGHT JACK' seems to be the way of the world.

Sandie & Louise keep in touch and Louise has frequently told me that if I ever need anything and unable to get out, to phone either Louise or Sandie and I know they wouldn't hesitate to try to help. That sort of friendship is 'priceless'.

brian.b

Ken R

Hi Sylvia, I was really pleasedto read your post concerning the elderly couple who live opposite you. It sounds like you made their day, by turning up to enquire about the gentlemans wife. If only more folk would take the time and trouble to do this, the world would be all the better for it. Where I live, I happen to be one of the oldest residents of the street !, but my neighbours still chat on a regeular basis and everybody knows how everyone else is without it being too nosey. There is one lady opposite me,Val, who is a couple of years older than me but is probably more spritely than me Embarassed

, she is an author and keeps herself pretty much to herself, but we do chat occasionally and I volunteer my services to hump compost bags etc. from her car for her after she's been to the garden centre. It was only throughtalking to neighbours last year that I doscoverd why peo[le from the other end of our cul d sac never speak to me at all, apparently, the bunch at the other end of the street are all convinced I'm gay because I live alone and they have never seen any females visit me ! They couldn't understand why my close neighbours were happy for me to chat to their younger kids and do the odd bit of babysitting for them, I think they had me pegged as child molester as well !

Still, I suppose I should be grateful that they noticed me at all, I do try to keep a low profile and not attract any attention to myself.

Sylvia

Hi Ken, just like you, I don't get in too deep with my neighbours either and keep myself, to myself. I don't know what my neighbours think of me, since I live all by myself too, but one things for sure, I'm definitely not the other way. I'm too much of a lady to be doing things like that and I much prefer Male company. Wink

However, each to his/her own. If people choose to be gay and many do, then it doesn't bother me, just as long as they don't ply their affections in my direction, I don't care what they do with their lives.

How sad that your neighbours think this of you. Perhaps you should invite your friend round (the police woman) for a cup of tea, preferably when she's not in uniform, that will make your neighbours think differently of you. Very Happy

I don't know you personally Ken, but judging by the content of the things you write on this forum, I think you are a very nice man indeed and very polite too! Embarassed

Sylvia

brian.b

last year my elderly father went into hospital and it should have been for 2 days, but ended up being almost 2 weeks as we very nearly lost him. when he came home, he was at home 3 days before his neighbours knew and where he lives there are 20+ bungalows in close proximity. not ONE noticed he wasn't there until they were told, and then they didn't know he was home until my youngest son and i went to visit him and make sure he was okay. i live 25 miles from him and so keep in regular touch.

Sandie Seward

I don't bother with most of my neighbours either. I am friendly with an elderly chap who lives downstairs, he is in his eighties, and his wife, although still alive, is in a care home. He was looking after her himself until a year ago, but she became too ill, had a fall in the bathroom, and broke her hip. Although they gave her a hip replacement, she has not walked since, and my neighbour could no longer cope. He suffers from chronic breathing problems, and it all became too much for him. Now, his wife's happily settled in her home, but he is the one who is suffering, as he really misses her.
(They have been married for over sixty years). Now he's absolutly lost without her. Sure, he can cook and his daughter comes and visits him a few times a week, but his life is now spent paying out for taxi's to visit his wife three or four times a week. Very sad, that they have to be separated after so long together. Sad

brian.b

brian.b

the attached reading was sent to me and makes you think.

An Everday Survival Kit

Here's What You Need:

Toothpick

Rubber Band

Band Aid

Pencil

Eraser

Chewing Gum

Mint

Candy Kiss

Tea Bag

Here's Why:

Toothpick - to remind you to pick out the good qualities in others. (Matthew
7:1)

Rubber Band - to remind you to be flexible. Things might not always go the way
you want, but it will work out. (Romans 8:2 Cool

Band Aid - to remind you to heal hurt feelings, whether yours or someone else's.
( Colossians 3:12-14)

Pencil - to remind you to list your blessings everyday.( Ephesians 1:3)

Eraser - to remind you that everyone makes mistakes, and its ok. (Genesis
50:15-21)

Chewing Gum - to remind you to stick with it and you can accomplish anything.
(Philippians 4:12-26)

Mint - to remind you that you are worth a mint to your Heavenly Father. (John
3:16-17)

Candy Kiss - to remind you that everyone needs a kiss or a hug everyday. (1 John
4:7)

Tea Bag - to remind you to relax daily and go over the list of God's blessings.
(1 Thessalonians 5:1 Cool

This is my gift to you.
May God richly bless you.
To the world you may just be somebody .... but to somebody, you may be the
world.

" A joyful heart is the health of the body." (Proverbs 17:22)

Author Unknown

Ken R

[quote="Sylvia"]....... I don't know what my neighbours think of me, since I live all by myself too, but one things for sure, I'm definitely not the other way. I'm too much of a lady to be doing things like that and I much prefer Male company. Wink

However, each to his/her own. If people choose to be gay and many do, then it doesn't bother me, just as long as they don't ply their affections in my direction, I don't care what they do with their lives..........

Sylvia[/quote]

I'm not really bothered what they think of me Sylvia and just for the record, I'm not that way inclined either and like you, I have absolutely no objections to anyones orientation, it would be a boring old world if we were all the same. at the end of the day, all that matters is that you are happy with your life and the way you live it. At least the neighbours know who I am and they do talk about me, which in this day and age is something I suppose ! I have tried marriage in the past but it didn't work out, it took me 13 years to find that out and I have no burning wish to repeat the experience again thank you. I am more than happy on my own, I cope moderately well and self analysis seems to point to me being a fairly well balanced sort of person ( I have a chip on each shoulder Smile

)

cheers

Ken

vailron · gruesome find

the thing that amazes me, is that according to all the reports i have read on the topic, the t.v and heating were still on, what about the electricity bill that must have been run up over 3 years, why did nobody pick up on that????

Sandie Seward

Hi Vailron, perhaps she was paying by Direct Debit, because I can't think of any other way that the Utility Company would have let the bill mount up so much.
I still think it's very sad that a fourty year old woman wasn't missed. Didn't she have any friends or relaitions that would have been concerned?

This whole issue smacks of gross negligence on someone's part.

Ken R

[quote="admin"]..........

This whole issue smacks of gross negligence on someone's part.[/quote]

You've hit the mail on the head there Admin, this is where it starts to get really interesting ! We are now entering phase one of that age old political game, " Passing the Buck" ! The Social Services will say its not their fault, someone should have reported her absence to the Police ! The Police will counter with the fact that she wasn't a criminal nor had she commited any offence etc. etc etc. And so it goes on Evil or Very Mad

I think the main hope by the authorities is that if it all drags on long enough, it will go away and we will forget it ever happened..........until the next time !

It makes yer blood boil Evil or Very Mad

brian.b

when i started to read this thread, like everybody else, i never thought i would get a phone call so soon about a friend who has been found dead. i first had a call to say there was some concern as nobody could contact him and then they said they had tried the hospitals because his car was at his home. in desperation the police were called who broke in and found him deceased. he was rambling in his speech yesterday and nobody could understand him, hence their concern this morning.

this friend has a daughter from his first marriage and years ago, she found her mother dead some years after her parents had divorced. then a couple of years ago, her husband had a bad accident and is now having 24/7 care. this morning unable to contact our friend being her dad, she phoned my aunt who got in touch with another relative of the friend. they all went to his house, but couldn't get in, so called the police who found him.

between phone calls, a neighbour came hammering on my door and said her light was making a funny noise, so would i have a look for her. it turned out the smoke alarm had come off the ceiling and it was going off. it took me nearly 10 minutes to get the battery out as it was in very tight. because she hasn't got a phone, i called the council who were out and sorted it within half an hour and the lady can't thank me enough, but i didn't do for a pat on the back, i just helped her out because she couldn't do it. no problem to me to help any of my appreciative neighbours.

Sylvia

It's so sad that a human being can be left alone to die and not even be missed, for three whole years? I wonder how many old folks (or younger ones, come to that) are seemingly alone and on the verge of death.

Now I know that they keep telling us that Social Workers are stretched to capacity and that there are not enough of them to go round. Why then don't the Government train up new recruits into Social Care, so that there are more of them to cover the populated areas? There's enough peoople out there, unemployed, who would be glad of a well paid job. Once qualified, Social Workers are very highly paid.

Sylvia

vailron · gruesome find

personally i think it goes back to the sixties and seventies, when redevelopment of our towns and cities started on a massie scale. as high rise estates were built whole communities were uprooted an dumped in these slums of the future, the community spirit was destroyed by this, and we all started to keep ourselves to ourselves, not concerned about our new neighbours. we all became a victim of modernisation and consumerism of the 60's and 70's

Sylvia

I think you have hit the nail on the head Vailron, community spirit did get lost once the high rise flats were built and made people isolated in their high rise homes.

Thanks for that, it's appreciated!

Sylvia

vailron · gruesome find

at least with the old back to back housing, you may of had nosey gosiping neighbours, but at least you all looked out for each other. modernisation isnt always a good thing.

Sylvia

Yes, Vailron, there was something worth having in those days, and our standard of living wasn't too great either, but if you was short of milk and anything else, the neighbours wouldn't see you go without.

I remember the days when I was just a small child and there was a large green (a playing field) in front of our row of Council houses. All the parents and us kids would get out in this field and have a game of rounders - such happy times. You never see parents out in the fields playing rounders with the kids these days, no because all the fields have been swallowed up to make way for housing and high rise blocks.

The Council called it progression with the times. I call it an eyesore and an excuse for the powers that be, to coin in more revenue. That's my opinion.

Sylvia

brian.b

Sylvia said: The Council called it progression with the times. I call it an eyesore and an excuse for the powers that be, to coin in more revenue. That's my opinion.

I couldn't agree more. Anything for extra income, but what do they do with it? WASTE it on very expensive celebrations for their colleagues and friends.

gruesome find

i remember opposite my grans was a huge common, whenever my brother and i visited grtan at weekends we spent hours playing on the common, however by the late 60's this was taken aver and developed into a housing estate, where we were not allowed to play

brian.b

pity you didn't register and join us guest. this is a good forum, with good people.

vailron · gruesome find

sorry, i forgot to sign in

brian.b · Re: gruesome find

Ken R · Re: gruesome find

[quote="vailron"]sorry, i forgot to sign in[/quote]

It's a common enough mistake Vailron, I used to do it all the time when I first signed up Embarassed

brian.b · Re: gruesome find

vailron · gruesome find

we all make mistakes. will just have to remember to sign in every time, its just that with some of the sites i visit, unless you log off you remain signed in all of the time. sorry

Sylvia

Hi Vailron, Just to let you know that I never log off of this site, therefore, I get straight back in when I click onto silversurfers.myfreeforum.org.

The few times that I have logged off, for some reason or other, I have difficulty getting logged back on again and have had to ask Admin for help. It seems that however many times I put in my correct identification password etc, it just won't have it and it's such an ordeal, that I find it much easier just to not bother logging off, then there isn't a problem.

Hope this helps.

Sylvia

vailron · gruesome find

i see what the problem is now, i never clicked on the log me on automatically box. i have now, so that should solve the problem, thanks sylvia

brian.b

our local police made a gruesome find this morning. they found one of our neighbours dead in his bungalow, but he was rowing with somebody only yesterday over letting his dog use neighbours gardens as a toilet. we knew very little about him other than it was said he was thought to be a paedo and know for a fact he was always on the drink.

Ken R

Sounds like the Police have more motives than suspects with that one Brian !

vailron · gruesome find

not the sort of thing you want to happen on your doorstep, so do you think he was murdered by the neighbours whos garden was being used as a tiolet???

Tricia

I know I'm late coming to this topic but I only found you all yesterday!

Reading these sad stories does make me realise how very fortunate I am. Although I live alone I have four sons and a daughter who live in the area and if my daughter doesn't speak to me on the phone for a couple of days she rings round the family to check all is well and asks one of the others to call round. They all know I am quite independent and go on holiday alone, usually to Tunisia, and I have crossed Australia on my own, but I know the family are usually just a phone call away. I also have some very good neighbours I can call on at any time. It is so sad when people fall out with their families and lose touch, which is what often happens.

Sylvia

Hello Trisha and welcome to this forum. How did you hear of Silver Surfers myfreeforum? I'm really glad that you did, however! I heard of it, because Sandie (Admin) lives just 10 miles away from me and she used to be very friendly with my youngest daughter. I live in Grays in Essex, by the way.

Look forward to reading your posts, when you're ready, of course, and just sending you a very big 'WELCOME'.

Sylvia

Tricia

Hi Sylvia,

Sorry for not replying earlier but I didn't get the usual email to say you had responded to my post Rolling Eyes

The way I arrived here is rather ironic. I am a member of a couple of other forums, one of which mentioned they had lost their position as top forum. They then gave a link for us to check and this led to a list of hundreds of forums, amongst which was SilverSurfers (well down the list) which sounded interesting. I had a quick look and decided to plunge in Laughing

Another Essex girl I'm afraid (Benfleet) but I promise I don't dance round my handbag and haven't worn white stilletos for simply ages!!

Sandie Seward

We're very pleased that you did dive-in, Tricia. Hope you enjoy your swim! Laughing

Ken R

there's always room for one more in our Surfers Pool Laughing

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